Forgiving the Unforgivable: 7 Steps to Overcome Your Bitterness and Find Freedom

This week we dropped Dr. Bruce Hebel’s podcast about his book, Forgiving Forward: Unleashing the Forgiveness Revolution.

He and his wife Toni lead Forgiving Forward Ministries in Fayetteville, GA. They’ve also created the Forgiving Forward Video Series. They have helped thousands of people through forgiveness coaching.

One powerful quote from the book is, “Freedom from the torture of bitterness only comes through forgiveness. Forgivers let people off the hook rather than desiring to make them pay. This freedom is found at the core of the Gospel message. If you cut the Gospel anywhere, it bleeds forgiveness.

Here is how we let someone, who may have hurt us deeply, off the hook. I pray that these 7 steps help you find health, freedom, and forgiveness.

Hebel’s 7 Protocols of Forgiveness:

1. Thank God for forgiving you.

He has forgiven you for so much (Romans 5:8).

2. Repent of your sin of unforgiveness.

You are responsible for your bitterness.

3. Ask God, “Who do I need to forgive, and for what?” (Matthew 6:14-15)

4. Forgive each offense from your heart.

Here’s how you do it:

  • “Lord, I choose to forgive _____, from my heart, for ______.”

  • “Lord, is there anything else I need to forgive ______ for?”

  • “Before God, I declare ________ is no longer in my debt.”

5. Seal it with a blessing.

Pray a blessing over those who have wronged you and keep doing it until you mean it! (Luke 6:27-36)

6. Commit to “not remembering” the offense.

Let me explain (Isaiah 43:25).

  • Say, “I specifically remember forgiving that.”

  • Praise God for the freedom forgiveness brought you.

  • Bless the person you forgave—again.

  • Pray for reconciliation.

7. Make pre-forgiveness a lifestyle.

Owned by no one and Free in Jesus,

Jim Ramos
President of Men in the Arena